The Window Inside
by Biribirichan
Summary: A look at Taichi's life through Kana chan's eyes. Chapter 3 is now up. Enjoy!
1. A closed window

Author's Note: Hi everyone :) This is my first time posting in the Chihayafuru section. I wanted to do a series of drabbles about Taichi and Kana's friendship since I've always found it very touching. Depending on what I want to do with the story, there will probably be about 5-6 chapters. Hope you like it! Comments and reviews are appreciated!

Disclaimer: I don't own Chihayafuru, or the Hyakunin Isshu poems.

…

"Ah there you are, Buchou!" Kana exclaimed. She walked over to the window where Taichi stood motionless. "Chihaya chan is looking for you! She wants a rematch."

Taichi looked at her amused. "Again? I've already played her twice today."

Kana smiled, "Well you know how she doesn't like losing!"

"Hmmm." Taichi turned his attention back to the view outside. It was a gorgeous spring day outside. The sun seemed to be spilling its rays everywhere, and the sakura blossoms near the school gates danced to the breeze. "Can you tell her I'll be back in a little bit? I wanted to rest my mind a little."

"Hai Buchou," Kana murmured as she withdrew from the window. She wanted to ask if anything was wrong, but Taichi didn't leave any room for questions. He almost never did.

As she turned the corner, she looked back at his silhouette, glowing in the afternoon sunshine. A piece of poetry floated in her mind.

"_In the peaceful light  
Of the ever-shining sun  
In the days of spring,  
Why do the cherry's new-blown blooms  
Scatter like restless thoughts?"_

Making her way back to the Karuta clubroom, Kana wondered again what their captain was thinking. She stopped at the door of their club, as was her habit, and peered through the small glass window at the top to check if a card was being read. The sight of a noisy Chihaya greeted her. She sighed as she thought how convenient it would have been if, just like the door she was standing at, people also had windows on their hearts, that showed what was going on inside.

"Don't be ridiculous Kana," she scolded herself. Opening the door, she made a resolution that the next time, instead of all this speculation, she would just ask the captain…

…

Author's note: Hope you enjoyed the story! The poem used is #33 from the Hyakunin Isshu.


	2. Looking in

Author's Note: Here's chapter 2! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Chihayafuru or the Hyakunin Isshu Poems.

…

She saw him again by the same window. Spring was almost over - there was a heaviness in the air that signaled the inevitable coming of summer.

"Buchou, aren't you hot by the window?" Kana asked as stepped beside him.

"Haha, Chihaya would say this is good training for the summer Karuta matches!" Taichi grinned.

Kana couldn't help but smile along. She felt happy that their captain wasn't beating himself up after finding out about Arata's confession to Chihaya.

As Taichi turned back to look out of the window again, Kana all of a sudden felt a pinprick of doubt. What if the happiness their captain exuded was only skin deep?

"Buchou, are you okay?" Kana ventured. She winced as soon as the words were out of the mouth. She _shouldn't_ have asked! How insensitive of her! But she had promised herself the last time that she would ask instead of uselessly wondering…

"I'm better than I thought I would be, actually," came the honest reply.

Kana chan stared. As much as she was surprised by her bluntness, she was more surprised by his honesty. She didn't know what to say.

Finally she spluttered out, "Buchou, we're all here to support you. Or at least, I'm here. The Karuta idiots of our club _still_ have no clue!" Kana suddenly felt indignant! How could they _not_ know? After all this time!

"It's okay. I'm okay," Taichi reiterated. Stretching out his hand towards the sun he continued, "I don't know what's come over me lately. I feel this…" Taichi trailed off, not really knowing how to explain himself. "When I play, I just feel like I won't lose, and I haven't! Not lately, not even with Chihaya."

Kana knew exactly what he was talking about. Chihaya had been complaining non-stop how Taichi was on fire, and how unfair it was that he kept on beating her. "Hai Buchou! You've been playing with great confidence."

"Mmm, I think that's it! I've stopped thinking about luck or fate or karma. I've stopped wondering if Arata would have been a better practice partner for Chihaya. I'm just playing to my heart's content. I'm playing my own Karuta."

"You're thinking about yourself for once, Buchou," Kana thought to herself. Aloud she said, "I hope I can get to read for you when you play your Meijin match, Buchou."

In a clear voice, she recited:

"_At the present time,  
Since I could bring no offering…"_

As a Class C player, the hope to read at his match was all she could offer to their beloved captain at the present time.

"_Here are brocades of red leaves,  
As a tribute to the gods."_

"A tribute to the gods, huh?" Taichi mused. He certainly hoped he could rise to _that_ level by the time Kana became a certified reader.

…

Author's notes: R&R if you liked the story! It keeps me writing :) The poem used was #24.


	3. Window Pain

Author's Note: Sorry it took me time to update this story! School has been really busy! But here is Chapter 3. Warning: Taichi gets bruised a little here, but don't worry I love his character too much to give him a sad ending. Hope you enjoy! Please rate and review if you like it.

P.S – Ravenanne chan, Nyank0 Sensei and Sabishi Tomoe, thank you for reviewing! It encouraged me to keep on writing :) Also Chiaki chan and Kat chan, thanks for all your support for this story on the forums!

Disclaimer: I don't own Chihayafuru or the Hyakunin Isshu Poems.

…

"Buchou! There you are!" exclaimed a breathless Kanade. She hurried over to where their red haired Karuta captain stood, and peered out of the window. "Oh! I didn't realize it was going to rain."

Following her gaze, Taichi replied conversationally, "Yeah, I wasn't expecting it either. The forecast showed sunshine." After a pause, he continued, "Did you need me for something Ooe-san?"

The girl seemed startled. "Welllll – you weren't at the club, and I figured you'd be by your favourite window. So I thought I'd come say hi. Hehehe." Even to Kana's own ears, her laughter sounded fake. "_He's going to see right through me_," she thought. "_I wonder if he knows._"

"Oh I see." Taichi responded, without asking to elaborate further.

Kana studied his impassive face, and decided that Chihaya must not have told their captain yet. After all, one couldn't mask emotions so well. Could they?

"So you're not coming today?" prodded Kana. "Chihaya chan was also wondering –"

She saw the change in Taichi's face the instant she mentioned Chihaya's name. "_Oh no! He knows_!"

"Bu-buchou, did Chihaya…did she…" Kana trailed off, not having the courage to finish the question.

She was rewarded with a cold almost monosyllabic reply. "She did."

Although Kana knew she was treading on dangerous waters, she had to ask – "When?"

"Does it matter?" Taichi whirled around to face the girl for the first time. "Tell me," he asked, his voice laced with anger, "Does it even matter anymore?"

Kana didn't know what to say. She had never seen their captain in such a state, with his mask flung aside and his emotions laid bare for anyone to see. Reacting more out of instinct than anything else, she reached out and patted his shoulder. "I'm sorry Buchou."

This simple gesture seemed to break something in Taichi. Turning towards the window, Taichi sighed and murmured, "I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me."

"It's okay Buchou. Sometimes it feels better to let it out rather than bottling it all up inside. I'm here to listen." Kana said.

Taichi didn't reply.

Kana sighed. She looked out of the window and glared at the rain that had started to fall. Why did the weather _have_ to be miserable on top of everything?

Her poetic nature made her feel that the storm outside was a reflection, not only of Taichi's heart, but of their beloved Karuta club as well. True, it was Chihaya's passion that brought them together, but it was their captain's leadership that _truly_ shaped the club. Now with the way things stood, she wondered what would happen to their team.

Kana reflected that things might be different if Taichi learnt to share his sorrows. But then again, did people ever change? If their captain had been more open with his feelings to begin with, possibly none of this would happened. Instead of Arata, Chihaya might have been Taichi's –

"She told me last night." Taichi said suddenly. "She called me to ask what I thought."

Surprised by Taichi's willingness to talk, Kana drew her breath in sharply. "Thought about what?" she prodded.

"What I thought about her saying 'yes' to Arata's confession."

"_No! Chihaya chan! How can you ask Buchou that!" _Kana fumed inside. Really! That girl was too dense for anybody's good!

As gentle as she could be, Kana asked, "What did you say?"

"Ooe-san, what _could_ I say? I just told her it didn't matter what I thought, and if she loved Arata she should say yes. And that…" Taichi's voice was just a whisper at this point. "I would support her, no matter what!"

"Buchou – you should have told her! You've been with her since elementary school. If you can't be honest with the person you love, who can you be honest with?"

"It's not that simple!" thundered Taichi. "You think I haven't tried? But her eyes, her mind were on Arata. Always on Arata."

"But her strength, her support has always been you Buchou! You were the hand that steadied her, you –"

Kana stopped seeing the tears that threatened to spill from Taichi's eyes. Her heart wrenched at the sight.

_Color of the flower  
Has already faded away,  
While in idle thoughts  
My life passes vainly by,  
As I watch the long rains fall._

"_Please don't fade away, Buchou_!" Kana thought silently.

Rubbing his eyes Taichi said, "Damn rain, getting through the window."

Looking at the window, Kana didn't have the heart to tell Taichi that it was firmly closed.

…

Author's notes: And that's the end of chapter 3! Hope you liked it, despite it being sad. The poem used was # 9. Please rate and review if you liked the story! It makes me happier than Chihaya with a new daddy bear accessory. Till next time ~


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